Gambling destroyed my family

Hi Looking4ward
I hope you get lots and lots of responses so you can get some of the support you need. Everything you tell about your mom is so typical of compulsive gamblers. I know it is so hard to understand when you dont have the addiction. I have tried so hard to understand my husband's gambling and how he could endanger our marriage of 32 years, our security for retirement, everything we hold dear and yet I cant because I dont have the addiction. I am not sure your mom has hit bottom yet as long as she believes she can have money. I feel so much compassion for her and for you and your family. Here is another web site to try for further help and support.
I have found a great deal of support there. Take care of yourself and God Bless.


I'm sorry that you and your family are going through this. I wish there was something I could tell you that would make it all go away. When I was out there gambling there wasn't anyone that could say anything that would have made a difference. Until I was sick and tired of being sick and tired was I ready to stop. I know that is a hard concept when it effects the people you love.

Gamblers Anonymous doesn't work until someone is ready to stop. I tried it several times before it worked for me. As a gambler you tend to look at all the reasons it doesn't work because you want to continue to feed your addiction.

The only advice I would give you is to stop giving her money. If she needs groceries buy some, don't give her cash or give it to your dad. You can't trust her with anything, she will lie about everything; at least I did. When you are in the thick of a gambling addiction the only thing that matters is your next bet and how to get to it, you don't care if you lie, or your husband, your family, and mainly yourself, you can't stop.

It might help you to talk to people in gamanon, they will have more suggestions. I wish you and your family well and hope your Mom figures it out before she loses everything.

Denise C
3 years and 11 days without a bet

Looking4ward, I know the pain you are going through. My husband of 25 years and I have separated 3 times in 4 years due to his addiction. This time we are getting a divorce{he has filed not me}This is something that I don't want but unfortunately he doesn't see that. It is a emontional disease not anything you or anyone else says or does is going to change your mother only she can do that. Don't you or anyone else give her money, this is only enabling her to go out an gamble. Talk to the national hotline about gambling, go to a gam-amon meeting. These will help you understand the disease. It did for me,I have educated myself on the disease since this break-up, I wish I had done that before but hindsight is 20/20. You will learn that this has nothing to do with any of you, this has to do with her. Something inside of her maybe stemming back to her childhood has caused this. There is another group you can post on , it's on MSN it's called Gambling Addicts Trying to give up. It is an interesting site. I read it everyday and post on it occasionally even through I'm not the addict, it sure has helped me. Good luck to you and your family and God Bless all of you.