Wow, never thought I would be here!

I hate gambling. Don't even know why I do it. It feels horrible, I lose every time, and yet I keep going back. This addiction just snuck up on me. Well I'm done! Welllll I want to be done! One day at a time right?

I am a 32 year old female. I have been addicted to gambling for 2 years. I am stuck on those damn slot machines; ya know the ones with all the cool bonuses? I have a great life and really always have. I have a great husband who is very understanding since I help him through his alcohol addiction (guess I couldn't let him have all the addictions). I also have a wonderful 10 year old son. The way I see it, my addiction started at abut the age of 10 when my mom taught me how to play Texas hold. I always loved games and the day I was legal to go into a casino, I was there. Instantly I was hooked, but still under control. I would gamble about 100 bucks a month playing pai gow poker. It wasn’t until I discovered slot machines and the quick instant gratification I got from them that it got out of hand. I can't say I have racked up that much debt from gambling, but I tell you there is not 1 extra dollar in my bank account after the bills are paid!

So I am here today to say I AM AN ADDICT AND NEED HELP.

It feels good to type about it, and finally, maybe, hopefully, turn things around. I thought exposing myself to my husband abut 6 months ago would help, but so far it has just made me a bigger liar. I hate lying! I like this site and have read many stories, and I realize how hard everyday is going to be, but it has to be done. I want to feel better about myself..

Thanks for listening!

I read a comment which

I read a comment which struck me, "People are as sick as their secrets."

When I admitted to people around me I had a gambling problem, it felt like the world had been lifted from my shoulders. After that, I told myself I made mistakes and I want to correct them.

I make mistakes. Do you make mistakes or do you make excuses? :-)

Everything will be fine.

It's nice to see a real

It's nice to see a real attempt to stop before losing everything. It's been my experience that this beast is an alligator - it eats and eats and eats.

Like alcoholism (bit of personal experience with that one), this disease of gambling addiction probably can't be cured, but rather - arrested. Kept stopped in place one day at a time.

In my case, I've gone too many times, too many games, too many plans. I learned stud poker at 5 (thanks a lot, Nanny). Blackjack, slots, roulette, and of course the wonderful world of Texas Holdem (live and online of course). Tournaments, limit grinding, you name it - been there, done that, and probably eventually lost.

And now, over 40 years later, back on day 1 again.

So good for you, young lady. You arrest this beast now before you do lose something really important that you can't replace. Trust me on that one, I've done that too.

I wish I would've got my addictive sh__ together when I was 32. But it didn't happen that way for me, I hope it will for you.

It's like I told this friend of mine who was riding the fence on this subject. You can stop now before you lose the things in life you truly love, or you can continue... watch 10 or 20 years tick off, get really emotionally beat up, then stop. Then you could be like me... a lot older.

You are on the right path. Stay there please.

Best Regards,

Mr. Boiny