Being comfortable in our own skin

I was watching "Intervention," a new reality show on A&E last night. It's about addicts who have gone too far and cannot see it themselves. Their friends and families are forced to call professional "interventionists." Well, this girl shows up at a residential treatment home. The intake worker was asked what the hardest would be. He said the hardest thing was to teach the addict to "become comfortable in their own skin and learn how to love themselves."

As I heard those words I thought: WOW. I think my problem was that I was never "comfortable in my own skin." I felt I always had to prove something to somebody, or I couldn't accept peace as part of life. It's been said that gambling is a self-hating, self-sabotaging behavior. If we don't love ourselves, I guess we would engage in self-hating behaviors, such as gambling.

Being comfortable in our own skin, as who we are, not as what others want us to be. As who we want to be. In the early stage of recovery I was told not to associate with gamblers or drug addicts. I used to be angry and resentful when people invited me to go gambling or if I knew they did drugs. In a way, I hated them; went as far as hating the casinos and the government for legalizing gambling.

Now, I could be in a room full of gamblers and I wouldn't be tempted to gamble at all. I could be in a room full of drug addicts and I wouldn't be tempted either. It's happened twice to me last week. Mr. Green

I firmly told the people who invited me gambling and drinking that "I don't like doing it. I will never allow myself to do something I don't like. I just prefer to do something else right now. Nothing you can say will change my mind. It's not for me."

You know what? They just said okay and left me alone. They didn't even bother to ask me again because I was very firm.

I've gotten to a point where if I don't like doing something (gambling, drinking, drugs), I simply won't do it. I don't have to make excuses anymore. I don't like doing it, I would prefer doing something else with my time and energy. People admire me more for it.

I'm beginning to become comfortable in my own skin.

Honesty, Monday March 07, 2005
07:20 PM EST


...and that IS a major accomplishment!!!!! Congratulations Honesty.


Honesty.. thats called acceptance